When The Only Way Forward Is To Start Over

Young woman starting over after a break up

Recently, my Whatsapp was glitching and I felt the best way to fix the problem was to uninstall and reinstall the app. The entire process took me just about 3 minutes but to my chagrin, I lost all my text from 3 months ago and all media from 2017. I nearly had a heart attack because a lot of things and conversations were lost. Both personal and work related.

And so, I proceeded to spend the better part of a Monday morning trying to solve the problem,  troubleshooting emails to Whatsapp admin and trying to fix the issues plus get everything back. It was all useless anyway and it was all truly lost. But I had spent a good work’s day trying to salvage what I already knew was lost instead of trying to move on.

That’s pretty much how it is in most aspects of life.

We know something is dead, gone and will not return but we pursue the past and try to get what we can from it.

Starting over is never easy.

It could be after a loss of a loved one, or after a divorce, after getting fired from a job or after a relationship you know was not good for you in the first place. It is not comfortable or easy and it isn’t romantic like the way it is often portrayed in movies. There will be tons of tears, and even falling into old habits. But you should get through the grieving process quickly and move on.

Don’t look back.

It is tempting to call that ex back, to find excuses, to beat yourself up over the incident that wasn’t entirely your fault. But don’t do it. The past is gone and the way to move is forward. The only time to take a glimpse back is to see how far you have come from this low point.

Find something to be excited about.

It could be something small or big. It could just be the mere gift of waking up every morning. Find a process, thing or person to be excited about in this next stage of your life.

Document small steps.

Acknowledge and mark small steps in your journey into the future. Little drops of rain, they say. This way, you’ll literally see yourself moving forward, getting over the past and embracing the future.

If 2020 has taught us anything, it’s that time and things are uncertain and many people have had to start over. You can do it. You can go through it. And it will be okay. It will be amazing.

 

 

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