April 10 last week was National Siblings Day. As expected, people posted all sorts of pictures of themselves with their siblings. From the throwback to the goofy and downright cringe-worthy. Many of these images were heartwarming.
However, even though family is everything, each family has its own peculiarities. For instance, an ideal family is characterised by love. But there can also be family issues such as rivalry between siblings or having one or two siblings whose unconventional ways sort of stresses everyone out. Here are a few ways to deal with such situation.
Understand their Perspective
Try to understand their perspective when altercations arise. Yes, it may seem like unwanted and unnecessary drama. And you may never understand how someone who came from the same womb as you turned out so different but seeking to understand their perspective may help. You may end up never understanding the thinking behind their actions. And at this point, it may be time to try one or two of the next few points listed below.
Know when to escalate
You may not want to cause a scene but if your sibling’s behaviour is eating you up inside it may be time to speak to another sibling or parent or family member. A trustworthy, wise family member who knows how to deal properly with conflict resolutions and will not make matters worse, as this is a possibility. Also, someone who is unbiased and loves you both, so you know whatever counsel they give is fair. Sometimes a third party may pick out some things that you’ve failed to see to see because of how annoyed you are with your sibling.
Create boundaries
If the two points before this fail or even if they work, it may be a good idea to create boundaries. No one should hold your emotions to ransom, siblings or not. Emotional rollercoasters are the worst and can end up affecting other areas in your life. Watch out for patterns and the things that lead to both of you going down that dark slippery slope and just know when to back out of or to completely stay away from those conversations or scenarios.
Give them some space
I believe this should be a last resort, after doing everything possible to maintain a cordial relationship. But sadly sometimes, tough love requires that you love someone from afar, even a sibling. This hard, but if someone refuses to change, it may be time to give them some space, even it’s just for a short period. I hope it doesn’t get this far though and that you’re able to have a cordial and loving relationship still, with your siblings.