Relationships are already a lot of work. You enter into them, hoping you have found the one. The apple of your eye, sugar in your tea, the suya pepper in my your suya life. You get my point. You put in a lot of effort and do everything not to jinx it.
Sometimes it works out and before you know it, there are wedding bells, carpools and primary school graduations to pay for. But sometimes, you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find the prince. Sometimes, relationships, even good ones, end. And it is at those times that you are tested beyond measure. You pick up yourself and what’s left of your emotions and find the next frog…or Prince!
Here are three ways to get you through it, quickly and to make sure you don’t carry any emotional or physical baggage to your next one.
Avoid Having A Rebound
This quick-fix method that people use to “get over” someone before moving to on is just a high that you will eventually get out of. And when all is done, a rebound just brings a sense of remorse and more heartache.
You can’t get over hurt by acting like it isn’t there. Or by filling up your life to bind that hurt. Acknowledge the hurt and be mature enough to deal with it. Go through all the stages and feel the pain. You will grow from it and find out that you’re much better because you didn’t skip any steps.
Build Your Self-Esteem
Many times when a person isn’t the one who initiated the breakup, they begin to find different faults in themselves. They say things like, “he must have broken up with me because of my body.” They begin to find faults in themselves when there is none. There are so many things that could cause a person to stop feeling a relationship. And sometimes, none of them is your fault.
A good exercise would be to list out all the things you feel are your strong qualities. Both with your physical appearance and your personality. You’ll find that you’re indeed amazing and no one should make you feel less than that.
Switch Up Your Routine
Usually, in a relationship, you both could have a favourite spot. A coffee shop, steak house etc. And going back to those places may make you feel worse. Try out three new places that you both haven’t been to together. This will help your routine feel less familiar and less painful to go through.
It’ll also take your mind off things as you’re busy taking in the sights and sounds of these new places.
Binge-watching Netflix and eating ice cream in your pyjamas may seem like the movie romcom way to go about things, but it may not be the healthiest way. Try out these steps to actually build yourself up and bounce back quicker.