A friend of mine came to me excitedly. Her Igbo father has finally accepted that her living on my own won’t lead to her being kidnapped. Or to men not wanting to marry her because she no longer lives with her parents. He has been properly schooled and the patriarchy that he was brought up with, slowly evaporating into thin air.
She’s so happy and can’t believe her luck. She told me she half expected him to scream in Igbo, “where do you think you are going to? Will you hop into the next Uber (pronounced “Uba”) and come home, osiso!
But that did not happen and now, both of us have spent the last few weeks, unpacking boxes, inhaling paint fumes and grinning broadly that this self-contained belongs to her. And me too of course, because what are friends for if they can’t crash in your apartment sometimes? Lol.
Doesn’t matter if the ceilings are low or the sink is slightly bent, or that I have to manually adjust it anytime I want to do dishes.
It’s still great.
But there were definitely a few things that she encountered that she didn’t expect.
You have to take on all the expense
When you’re living with your parents, you don’t even know where the toilet paper comes from. You just know that it is always available for use. Little things like grocery shopping and buying a long broom will shock you. You realize these things cost money and don’t even come cheap. And you have to think of things like light and water bills too? Ha!
You may still have curfews
Unless you’re Kylie Jenner with a little over a billion dollars and very few money worries, your first apartment outside home will most likely be rented out. And in that case, you may still have security and gate rules and curfew hours from the other tenants and the security team.
I know you expected to be living your best, ”uninhibited” life, but haha, it’s not always the case. I got a call from the same friend at 1 am and she was stuck outside because the gateman just won’t rouse from his sleep despite the ruckus she was causing by knocking on the gate. Another neighbor finally had to come let her in.
You may not have so many friends over
Similar to the last point, one of your reasons for moving out may be to host house parties and sleepovers, organize PS4 battles and plan a grill fest with food and booze all weekend long. Sorry to break it to you. But you will quickly realize that after a long week of work, all you want is some alone time in your home with a couple of glasses of wine and your favourite Netflix shows.
That’s Adulting for you, guys. Sorry, it isn’t as glamorous as you may think. It is still exciting to take the next step. You get your freedom and some time to discover yourself. So enjoy it and relish it while it lasts. ❤